“Kya karna kya hai tujhko life mei? You cannot get
everything at once yar!” he said. And he said so to direct my crazy confused
soul in a single direction for the upcoming quarter. My mind was indecisive. It
still is. Life suddenly seems very restrictive. The sea of opportunities that I
was dying to explore has just turned out to be a lake. We can traverse only a
particular square. Sometimes, you just cannot cross the borders simply because
there is too much at stake.
When I realized I cannot take all the courses I like I
remembered all the things (recent times strictly) that I have always wanted to
do but could not. Giving up on something untangled was one such thing. I have
always wondered why all of us cannot have everything…everything at once! Why do
we have to give up on something in order to achieve something else? Why do I have
to give up on milk chocolate just because I want to have a darker one? Is it
unfair for me to have both the chocolates at once? Not that I am snatching the
milk one from someone else…but…if both the milk and dark chocolates are
available on the shelf why can’t I have both? Just because they pose a threat to
my teeth and gums?
The world follows some rules (unfortunately) the golden rule
being ‘You cannot have everything you want’. “Kuch paane ke liye kuch khona bhi
padta hai” is the rule. But kuch paane ke liye kuch khona kyun padta hai? So
that we can make space for the new thing/person? Something similar is said in the
book ‘The Secret’ too. I, somehow, have started to disagree to it now. The
khona-paana part ceases to make sense to me. How I wish everyone could have
everything! At Halloween you can have a broom and a nice hat and be a witch or
grow wings and be a fairy. Why cannot I grow wings and still wear the witch’s
hat and become a FITCH?
I am still searching for answers to my questions – Why cannot
I have everything at once? Why do we have a ‘risk’ factor for everything in
life? Who decides on who deserves what? Does God/karma maintain a spreadsheet
for everyone that says ‘Can have’, ‘Cannot have’ with expiry dates for everything?
I personally hate databases but if God or Karma maintain such records then the
database would be loads bigger than ‘Big Data’.
I found this quote on the website http://lifesbestadvice.com/2012/04/01/you-cant-have-everything-you-want-but-you-can-have-everything-that-matters-to-you/
… Maybe it is kinda true -
“You can’t have everything
you want, but you can have everything that matters to you”
Maybe God has his own way of directing you to whatever is
good for you and whatever matters to you. Maybe not. God obviously does not run
the biggest telecommunications company in the universe and hence will never be
able to talk you into something. Karma is busy too and cannot stop you from
committing a sin every time you attempt it. Hence Karma finds some way to
punish you for every mistake the severity of which depends on the severity of
the mistake.
I want everything in life including the things I know shall
harm me. But how wise is it to lose everything you own to have something you
can never own? Why do we walk the wrong paths when we know it ends in a valley?
Maybe for the sense of having everything for a short time?
P.S: I miss everything. Badly.
Current Mood: Disappointed.
Current thought: Everything at once.
