Sleepless in Seattle – Part 6 - Go BIG or Go home

The day had begun even before the day began. We were all suited up! The shady experiences did not occur unexpectedly. It was cold. The suit did not protect me but I did not mind that. I was too nervous to mind. We reached and the grilling began.

I had the unexpected opportunity to sell myself that day (yet to know whether I was successful) to one of the largest firms on earth. The interviewer pushed me to jump off from the 19^th floor. I tried my best to be glued to my seat. After being barbecued in all the rounds we found ourselves in… well… Jeopardy. We, desis, had never heard of it. Apparently, we were supposed to choose a category and answer questions for points.  We went first. The extremely peppy, vivacious, Edward Cullen-looking guy besides me said “A day in life – 1000 points. Go BIG or Go Home!” I could simply focus on ‘Go BIG or Go Home’.

Something about the quote was attractive. Actually, everything was attractive. Just the one statement he made motivated everyone and none would play for less than a thousand points. I figured out everyone sort of agreed to his statement. That is what we are here for, right? For going BIG. Real BIG.

Coming from India I have realized it takes immense guts to even dream big. Support isn’t everywhere. You need to be extremely lucky to dream and to receive the support to fulfil your dreams. Once you reach the pathway nothing can stop you. They are right when they say – “If it hasn’t left your mind for quite some time it is worth a shot.” But it takes guts to even to dream about the thought lingering in your mind since long.

The thought of going BIG made me think. Is it important in life to go big? Maybe it is. Life is all about taking risks, isn’t it? That new girlfriend, new project, new lover, new picture, new workplace, new cuisine, new dress! If we look at life everything seems to be a risk. Will life be fun if we wear the same clothes every day? If we never try to cook a new dish? Every dress is risky. Every dish can be a mess. That’s what makes life fruitful. If we take risks we better make sure it is worth it. It is important to go all the way…in whatever you do. ‘Well begun is half done’ but who wants to be a ‘well begun’. If you take a risk go all the way. Go Big. What’s the use of taking a risk otherwise?

I don’t know if the demi Edward Cullen really meant what he said or he even knew that his simple quote (that he might have used to sell himself) had motivated the entire room. Looks like Motivation happens unknowingly.

Current mood: Lovely.

Current thought: Go BIG or Go Home.

Sleepless in Seattle - Part 2 - Back Back Back!

It was a perfectly beautiful day and I was having a not so perfect time… career counseling myself. I was trying not to look into my phone for any Whatsapps that could help kill a few minutes from the most important seminar of my life. My phone vibrated unnaturally and so I looked into it. It was already unlocked and the messenger was open. Never knew what my palms could do without thinking. It was him…

I was pretty amused that my deeply hidden messenger opened automatically and the window was his...all this in the most important hour of my day. The messages suddenly felt good. I realized I was sort of yearning to talk to him for a while.

We ended up on a bad note for me and a good one for him. It was neither a relationship nor friendship. I realized I looked up to him. I was naïve and was looking for someone to show me the right path…and he did. You don’t need to be in a relationship to learn things from someone…in fact you don’t even need to be friends with someone. People who are meant to come into your life just walk in and out of your life at the right time. He was one of those.

There is always one guy in everyone’s life who they want to go back to…not literally…not even virtually...neither temporarily nor permanently…just for some time. This guy is always there when you need help, advice, support and anything else that you need. That is not his full time job but maybe he doesn't mind it. He is sort of….your career counselor…who takes care of your emotions, problems and everything else when you are in deep shit. Maybe a Life Mentor! He is the answer to all the questions and solution to all doubts. You don’t need to talk to him all the time…just at the time of need is enough. This low maintenance relationship (I don’t know what to call it) sustains on absolute no-talks. A simple ‘Hi’ from someone is re-assuring and sometimes even a long talk with someone feels fake. There is a certain comfort and re-assurance in a ‘Hi. I am busy.’ It’s funny how some people touch your life so much and so beautifully in a very little time.

I don’t know what such relationships are called. It’s definitely not love. Whatever, it is… feels good.

Where do you want to be?

It was a rainy day and I was enjoying nothing with my estranged best friend. All I wanted to do was run away and tell her that the vibe was too cold to be warmed up again. But I didn’t want to hurt her and I decided to stay back. As I was engrossed in my thoughts I heard her saying, “I have everything in my life now and I don’t want to lose anything.” I am Sorry.. did she say EVERYTHING? This meant she knew where she wanted to be in her life and she was exactly at that place. That seemed like a remote possibility for a girl my age.

I knew she has a boyfriend and a job (don’t know how much it pays though). But really… is it possible for anyone to have everything and be happy? And how does one know that he/she is content? Have human beings stopped being greedy? I left being totally dissatisfied with my life and shocked about her being satisfied with hers.

Then I realized I would not be satisfied in the near future because I didn't know what I wanted out of life. And she did! One can never be satisfied unless one knows what he/she wants. That’s our problem. We seldom know what we want and when we do we are not sure if we want that. And when we get what we wanted we suddenly realize that we no longer wanted that. And if someone else gets what we wanted we want to have what he/she wanted. The series of ‘wants’ is confusing but this is what happens in life.

Well, it is true. We don’t know what we want in life. Most of us just believe in going with the flow. Take up Science after tenth, go to Engineering, and take up a job….and whatever. But is that what we really want? A good career? A good spouse? A better job? I think all of our life is spent living the fear of our in the flow goal. A lot of us can never really decide about what we really want in our lives. I am obviously one of them.

Maybe this is what all of us should do… For a moment we must all forget about our current careers and jobs and think about what we really want to do 5 years down the line and work towards it. Where do you see yourself? Do you see yourself skiing in Switzerland or clicking wildlife in Africa or writing a romantic novel or settled down with that friend of yours you never thought you’ll marry? What do you see yourself doing?

Maybe life isn't that complicated as we think it is. Maybe life is simple if we try and figure out. We have to realize that ‘making a living’ and ‘living life’ are two different things and focus on being successful according to ourselves rather than being successful according to others.

P.S: Totally feeling like a spiritual Guru today.